“Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.” Hebrews 11:1
A faith upgrade is necessary for my spiritual journey because I want (and need) to feel fully devoted to pleasing God, leaving everything to Him. Psalm 37:5 instructs, “Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust him, and he will help you.” I want to entrust everything–my decisions, possessions, life, family, etc.– to God because He knows everything and knows how to best care for me better than I can. A similar verse reads, “Commit your actions to the Lord, and your plans will succeed.” Proverbs 16:3. I know I must commit my actions to God, yet I skimp on that in several areas.
Though I believe God’s Spirit is guiding my conduct, I do find myself expressing doubt towards Him. Will God meet all my needs? What is His purpose for my life? What does He want me to accomplish in life? These are among the questions that haunt my mind. My constant worry of God’s ability to meet my meets looks like this:
When doubt enters, it weakens my faith since it leads me to question God’s capabilities. The missing Jenga blocks create empty spaces between them, leaving the structure liable to collapse. My actions and behaviors signify my faith since what I do–or not do– reveals my idols and beliefs. For example, Iow self-confidence deters me from applying to retail or sales jobs (though I have applied to several) because I don’t see myself in that industry. I see myself as a writer or, perhaps, an author. What book do you want me to write, God?
When I ask God to reveal himself only to hear no response or see no tangible results, doubt snatches my faith. The more Jenga blocks removed from the structure, the less strong and stable it grows. Times came where I asked God, “What job or career do you desire for me to pursue?
19 Cling to your faith in Christ, and keep your conscience clear. For some people have deliberately violated their consciences; as a result, their faith has been shipwrecked. 1 Timothy 1:19
The 1 Timothy verse addresses clinging to faith and keeping a clear conscience. Those who violate their conscience result in their damaged faith. The word shipwrecked evokes images of a sunken or destroyed ship. Like a shipwreck, faith can break– but not beyond repair if one repents. Damaged faith is one that is lacking in unity and cohesion as the devil inflicts hardships, pain, and suffering. It is riddled with fears, doubts, and concerns. My mind contains doubts, fears, and anxieties–mainly for my future.
What was once a whole Jenga structure now contains gaps.
When the devil steals my entire faith, wrong decisions and wayward behavior ensue. Succumbing to temptation grows, impure thoughts enter, and destructive habits form. Eventually, my faith looks like this:
Down it goes!
I must always remember: “The Lord will work out his plans for my life–for your faithful love, O LORD, endures forever. Don’t abandon me, for you made me.” Psalm 138:8